Farewell

We leave Qatar in 2 hours. Yes, it is with mixed emotions that we leave. I guess that is good. We are anxious to return to the U.S. for so many reasons. We leave here knowing that this experience has enriched our lives. As I look around at our apartment now - bags sitting by the door packed and dust everywhere - I think of all that has occurred over the past several months - and how I have been changed by the experience. I have learned some things about myself that surprise me. I have definitely stepped outside my comfort zone -- and it's been good in so many ways. I believe things happen for a reason and this adventure of one of those things that happened for a reason. I remember the day we arrived and the excitement I felt when I tried to imagine what would lie ahead. Certainly, I was apprehensive. It has now happened and the experience is ending. And our life here has evolved in ways I never anticipated. I am so glad we came here. And, now I am ready for the next adventure!

Travels

We arrived "home" in Doha just after midnight last night. Spent the entire day (10 hours) in Mumbai between flights from Bangkok to Doha. We tried to "escape" the airport during the 10 hours, hoping we could at least hire a driver for a quick tour. No such luck. We were "prisoners" in the airport. Despite repeated attempts to obtain a reprieve from our confinement, we were told that a visa was necessary and the application process had to be started before arriving at the airport. Airports are not bad places really. Just rather uneventful places. After watching the sales clerks in the airport stores sit without a sale for 8 hours straight, I decided that I was glad I was not working as a sales clerk in an airport. The only real excitement was watching the pilgrims on their way to Jeddah, which is always an interesting drama. We have watched this in other airports, but it never ceases to amaze me. The Haj must be an amazing experience. Many are transported in wheelchairs or get around on crutches. Many are obviously in families and range from infants to the very old. For many, this trip probably represents a life's worth of savings. That being said, I would not recommend 10 hours in the Mumbai airport. I started at the end of our trip. This trip started 2 weeks ago. Bound for Hong Kong, we began this eventful advdenture with a delay in Sri Lanka. Our first stop after a short flight from Doha to Dubai was Colombo, Sri Lanka. We missed the flight from Sri Lanka to Bangkok, so the airlines put us up for the day in a resort on the Indian Ocean. Sri Lanka is a poor country, pretty third world. But ----The beach was gorgeous, the food was wonderful and the room was a welcome respite from the airport chairs. All in all, despite the 10 hour delay, the stay in Sri Lanka was pretty nice! We made it to Hong Kong a day late. Our hotel was very nice and well located on the causeway. We signed up for a tour of the island which proved to be very informative. We took a boat trip in Victoria Harbor and a bus ride around the island and to the top of the highest peak on the island. We had no time for shopping, but we saw the markets and spent some significant time walking in the Hong Kong public gardens in the middle of the financial district. We also took public transportation around the city and to and from the airport. Public transportation is great! From Hong Kong, we flew to Bangkok where we met Jonathan and his girlfriend Emily. They were easy travel companions and put up with our tours of the religious temples. We shopped at the local markets (which are too numerous to even count) and tasted plenty of local food. All was pretty good! Bangkok too has a great public transportation system and we used it every day we were there. We enjoyed the public ferry system along the major river in the old part of the city and took the ferry both days to visit more temples. These temples were really outstanding! The sights and smells of Bangkok are hard to describe and hard to forget. It is not a clean city. Our last night in Bangkok we went to a bar at the top of one of the "high class" hotels in Bangkok (not our hotel) and the view was amazing. This is a city of over 10 million people. It is overwhelming from high up! But, it's crowded and there are people living everywhere and in places I would not want to live. There is plenty of street "hustling" that can be rather bothersome at times. Prices for everything are negotiable. We even tried the street food, but we were careful to drink only bottled water. Our next stop was Chiang Mai. What a wonderful change from Bangkok. Not nearly as big and it is nestled in the mountains in northern Thailand. We walked to most temples and street markets from our hotel. Goods were cheaper than Bangkok and there did not seem to be as much hustling as in Bangkok. Although signs warned about pick pockets, I did not see signs warning about tourist hustlers that take you to tourist shops as detours rather than your requested destination. We were hustled in Bangkok (and I almost agreed to the hustle once!), but not in Chiang Mai. We attended a Thai cooking class one evening that was really informative and fun ( Yes, we are all now Thai cooking experts. Just ask us!) and spent another day touring outside the city --- including a log raft trip, an elephant ride, a visit to an orchid garden, an ox cart ride to a "village" in a beautiful and picturesque area outside Chiang Mai, and a chance to pet wild tigers! Emily and Jonathan also visited a snake "farm" and held venomous snakes. A thrill for them, but not on my "bucket" list. I managed to take the 4 of us on a walking tour of Chiang Mai and only got lost a few times. We ate good in Chiang Mai --especially when we cooked it ourselves! We ended our Thailand adventure at Phuket and Phi Phi Island. What a great contrast to the cities. In Phuket we booked a lovely resort hotel on a hill in a pretty decent part of the island. Phuket is pretty wild and is known as a hot spot for college age people. J. and I were a bit concerned as to whether this last leg of our trip would be enjoyable, but it turned out to be just perfect. I indulged in a wonderful Thai massage in Phuket. This was my third. I had one in Bangkok and one in Chiang Mai. The Phuket massage was the best! Perhaps I should write a book about massages in Thailand. I would not mind being an expert in this! We walked along the Phuket (Karon beach area) beach nearby, but mostly enjoyed the resort! Breakfast at a nearby outdoor restaurant was very nice. Then we took a 4 hour ferry trip to Phi Phi Island and a lovely resort on the most deserted part of the island. This was truly wonderful and relaxing and a great way to end our trip. Thanks to Jonathan. This was his idea! We watched the sunset each evening from the Sunset Bar on the resort property, which had a great view of the surrounding islands and the China Sea. Emily and Jonathan spent one whole day snorkeling around some islands close by and we just relaxed along the beach. We walked to a couple resorts within a mile or so of our resort and decided we were staying at the very best resort possible. One evening we ate at a restaurant outside the resort where the husband cooked the meal and his wife served us while his 2 year old tortured the family kitten in front of us. We were the only people in the "restaurant" and we had to climb stairs along the hill just to access the "restaurant". We agreed the food was great and (so far) no repercussions! We watched young men throw and twirling flaming sticks on the beach one evening ----and the last day we watched the sun rise. Then it was back to Phuket and Bangkok. From Bangkok, Emily and Jonathan flew back to Chicago and J. and I eventually made it back to Doha. The best part of the trip was spending time with Jonathan and his girlfriend. It didn't hurt that we spent that time in Thailand, which is a pretty exotic place to spend time. We took pretty many pictures between us, so the time is well documented. Except for the 3 massages I got. No pictures of those in case you were wondering.

Leave Taking

Last evening we said goodbye to Susanna and her family. She prepared a lovely Indian dinner for us. Today, we will say goodbye to Mahroof and his daughter. He's been a friend from the moment we first met him last June at the Fulbright orientation in Washington. Slowly we are bidding farewell to this desert country that has been our home for almost 6 months and the people that have made it so memorable. We leave tomorrow for a 2 week trip to Southeast Asia and will be back here just long enough to wash our clothes and repack for our trip home. I really hate goodbyes. They seem so final somehow. I hope not. It's amazing how kind many of the people here have been during our short stay. They have enriched our lives. I am glad we took the opportunity, the chance... whatever this is. How easy it is to get comfortable in the routine in our lives. Sometimes it is the uncomfortable times when you just throw yourself into something as unfamiliar as life here is, that remind you of the big adventure life can be and surely is. With all it's "differentness", I will miss life here. I can honestly say that I never regretted the decision to live here or to interrupt my life for a change and a chance to see what else I could do, what people in this part of the world were like. Ten years ago, we took another break similar to this, in Cyprus. That experience was very different from this one. Perhaps I was better prepared this time --- or just older. This time I was more comfortable, less anxious. Perhaps even more grateful for what came along and what happened during the months away than the last time we were "gone" for so long. Life surely is an amazing adventure. What will happen next? I can't wait to find out!

A delayed trip

One year ago, our church in Chicago offered a trip to Israel with 2 of the pastors as leaders. We wanted to join this group and it seemed a good way to spend our 40th Anniversary. We couldn't go because of the Fulbright orientation in Washington, so here we are --- a year later --- finally taking the trip to Isreal. We had a window of opportunity - between the last class at the university and the final exams! This time our guide was Ezra, a 72 year old Isreali. Ezra has done a little bit of everything, including serving in the army, growing up in a kibbutz, driving a bus, marrying an artist, hiking all over the country, building air bases in southern Israel, assisting in the assimiliation of the Jews after the second world war, learning the history of Israel to guide tours, .... and crafting his own bit of history from the jewish perspective. He was entertaining to say the least and as long as we remembered his one sided perspective on this part of the world, we were just fine. I must say, we enjoyed our trip immensely and wonder why we waited so long and why we had such concerns about safety issues. We saw little evidence of conflict or trouble. Perhaps with news of fighting in Syria and concerns about Iran, Iraq and Afghanistan, Israel has taken a "back seat". Jerusalem was my favorite city of the trip. It is a place that Christians, Jews and Muslims consider "holy" and they all seem to be able to live together in this amazing area of the world. This was a "highlights" tour, so we took in Nazareth, Bethlehem, Capernum, Haifa, Mt. Olive, Jericho, Ceasarea, Sea of Galilee, and the Jordan River. Personally, I was amazed at how truly beautiful and green and mountainous the country is. I just didn't picture it that way. Jerusalem is pedestrian friendly in the Old City and very easy to find your way around. Souks are everywhere. Selling to tourists (and locals) is "big business" in Old Jerusalem. We wandered in and out of the different sections of the city -- Christian, Muslim, Jewish and Armenian. In the evening, we even walked on top of the souks to see a bit of the city from the perspective of those who live within the walls. The apartment living in the Old City is cramped and appears simple. Children play in the alleys. One group of little girls tried to stop us from crossing thru the alleyway -- giggling all the while! Outside the walls of the old city, the public transportation makes it an easy city to navigate. We took public transportation, but mostly enjoyed the walking. One evening we ate at a lovely restaurant just outside the old city on a hill overlooking the Jaffa Gate. We ate on an outside veranda and the view was lovely. Another nice part of this tour ---- we had evenings free and we ate wherever we wanted to each evening. The Dome of the Rock, the Wailing Wall, the Via DelaRosa were well worth the trip --- and we were pleasantly surprised at the relative lack of tourists, despite the wonderful weather and the politically calm times. We had to laugh when we asked about the thousands of graves along the Kibron Valley just outside the walls of the Old City. Those grave sights are costly, but people believe that if they are buried there, they will be the first to rise when the new Jerusalem comes. We took a boat trip across the Sea of Galilee and enjoyed 2 nights in a kibbutz on the northern tip of Isreal not far from the border of Lebanon. The kibbutz was located in the hills in a quiet setting surrounded by barbed wire fencing, a reminder no doubt of times past and the fear of conflict in the future. Look out towers surrounded the kibbutz. We saw bomb shelters, a nursery school, a grade school and a small high school. Children played in a field by the school, families had small apartments and were eating on their small patios, and we saw older people walking or riding on old motorized carts along the narrow roads. There was a barn on the kibbutz, with over 100 cows, orchards with fruit trees, a chicken coup, and a small retail store with handmade gift items. We shopped at the kibbutz grocery store for our dinner (good old bread and cheese!) and ate on the patio with views of the surrounding hills and the watch towers of the hills of Lebanon. I think the "money-maker" for the kibbutz is the hotel we stayed in. It's located on the kibbutz grounds, with very simple (but clean) rooms, and a dining room. The buffet breakfast was great! Mt. Hermon is nearby. We traveled along the West Bank and the Golan Heights. Now we have some perspective on what this is! The Bahi Temple and gardens in Haifa are amazing. Finally, we stayed overnight in Tel Aviv before catching a plane back to Amman,Jordan and back to Doha. Tel Aviv is a huge city on the Mediterranean. A bustling, rather dirty city. We could have skipped that city as far as I was concerned, although we enjoyed a walk along the beach and dinner along the beach while watching the sun set. We left on the Sabbath, so very few planes were operational and the airport was virtually empty. None of the Isreali planes fly on the Sabbath, so we took Royal Jordanian back to Doha. I can see why people live in Israel. I would return.

Some more acts of kindness

This morning, one of J's students (with the help of her driver) delivered our lunch! There was chicken Majbos, shrimp Hares, sweet Aseda and a lovely salad and cucumber dressing. This was a Qatari student who said this was typical Qatari food. We had enough to eat and 1/2 to freeze for when we return. Tomorrow we are off on our adventure to Isreal! We received an email from another teacher that J. works with in his workshop inviting us for dinner when we come back for finals after our trip. We also have some food from Mary Pat, who left last evening for the states. (Dan, if you are reading this --- Mary Pat is on her way!) A friend is following us today to return our car. We rented this car for 3 months and it's been dependable, not pretty by any means, but it gets us where we want to go. It's purple and rather small, compared to the white Land Cruisers, Lexus, Land Rovers, and other big SUVs that everyone else drives. Last evening we ate dinner at Landmark Mall. We don't often go to the malls here, but the Qataris do! With Villagio shut down for at least 2 weeks, Landmark (which is close to us) was packed. As you probably read, Villagio suffered a devastating fire a week ago. Several children in the nursery located there on the second floor or the mall died. Several people have been arrested. Safety precautions were not taken. Sprinklers and fire alarms did not work. The country is pretty upset over this --- with the possibility of the Olympics or other world wide games here, such a documented tragedy doesn't bode well. Getting back to nice things. One of the Lebanese staff at the university has cooked us 2 meals. She brings them to J. at school and he brings them home. This young woman says J. reminds her of her father! The food was delicious. I've been meeting with several people this past week now that classes are done for the semester. I still have lots of questions about how this country works, how the laws are passed, how foreigners do business here, and all the many, many questions people like me have ! The people I have met with have been helpful ----- and nice. That doesn't always happen when you ask questions. Or, perhaps, people aren't always nice when I ask questions (come to think of it, I am usually asking questions in a deposition, so why should people be nice!). Anyway, I've spent a lovely week getting some of my curiosity quenched ---- but certainly not all of it. That would take years! Students of both of us have been emailing the last couple days. Thank yous for being their teachers. Really nice emails. Hope we taught them something. They mostly taught us.

Things I won't talk about

How is that for a title? Actually, there are plenty of these topics. Saved for another day. It never fails. Just as you are about to pack up and leave, you meet some people you wish you had met 5 months ago! Like a Canadian researcher writing about Qatari women's issues, a lawyer in one of the foreign law firms that works on joint ventures, a Mayalsian on the Board of Directors of the Sisters of Islam, a Saudi woman teaching in Qatar, a Palestinian feminist, an Egyptian business man with interesting connections, an Islamic scholar from Bosnia. a woman writing about child camel jockeys in the UAE. Don't worry. I took notes. Someday I'll talk. I like the people here. I will miss them. Like the security guards at Qatar University. Usually, kind and helpful. The cleaning staff --- from the Phillipines and Sri Lanka and India and Nepal. Not here because they want to be, but here because of the promise of work and money to send home. This country imports 95% of what they use. The country is determined to become more self sufficient so that means they cannot be totally dependent on oil and gas. Diversitfication - sustainability. All the issues that we, in America, know are important. I understand that agriculture is something that this country would like to consider and they are even buying land in other countries --- like Ethiopia. Wow! Maybe we need some Morgan County farmers over here to grow some corn and beans in the desert! Or a FutureGen in Qatar! Sometimes we joke that this country has more money than God --- but, truly, money is not the issue. Tourism is developing. We decided to look up Barbizon Towers this morning. Kind of a "one more thing we wanted to see" place before we left---- one of the only natural "wonders" left in Qatar. It's only 15 minutes from where we live. Not much has been preserved in this Beduion society, so you look for things to go see here! Well, we found the Barbizon towers. Part of an old watch tower and fortress complex. Poor families live around it and in it and a school occupies a portion of the watch tower structure. It's crumbling. One corner area is a trash dump. There is no entrance to this structure, although you can see steps that probably lead to the tower. You just can't get there. Dirt roads with big pot holes surround the area. But, it is there and this is one thing I decided to talk about! Last evening was our potluck - 8 neighbors came over for dinner. All post doctoral students. Several from Malaysia, one from China, Bulgaria, and the 3 Americans. Another regret ---- I should have organized this sooner. While we have been to a couple get togethers here and all were nice and relaxing ----it takes the initiative of one person to do it---- and I like doing this, so I should have done it earlier. And I won't talk about our conversation ---- that's for another day when I am back in the U.S.A.

Food in Qatar

Actually, I really did not expect that this would be a topic for me. While I love to eat, I enjoy the eating more when it is mixed with conversation. It is usually the conversation I remember more than what I ate. Well, last evenings dinner was an exception. We ate at Nusantao: Sea Kitchen at the Four Seasons Sheraton in Doha. This restaurant specializes in Indonesian, Middle Eastern, Japanese, Chinese, and Indian food. Our celebration-- end of the semester treat! I have frankly never tasted such good food. We ate for almost 3 hours, so I do not know all we ate but it included a sashimi platter, soup, grilled salmon onigiri, fried prawns, grilled ofu, chilean sea bass, lobster, dumplings stuffed with sea food, chocolate fudge like squares (that even I thought was rich!) and several different types of ice cream and sorbet. The wine was South African --- just right with all the fish. We went home and I even dreamed about fish. We have eaten at some amazing places in Doha. But, this was the best! This is not to say that the conversation was not good. We debated second and third wave feminism and talked about how quickly the time has passed here ----- and how lucky we were to be eating such amazing food!! In America (or, perhaps, the America I know), the best restaurants are not in hotels. Here, some of the best restaurants ARE in hotels. We have eaten at several and they indeed rank amoung the best in Doha. By the time we left the restaurant after 10PM, the place was pretty crowded. Obviously, dinner time is very late here by American standards. Now, to the other extreme. We are having a potluck tonight at 5:30 at our apartment. Stay tuned! The conversation will be interesting---- but don't count on rave reviews of the food. Especially mine. Which reminds me, after my meetings later this morning and this afternoon, I should get home just in time to throw something together and straighten up this place a bit to make room for our neighbors! I will concoct some famous (or infamous) BF dish --- it won't be lobster or sea bass---- but it may be chicken and noodles! You won't find it on the menu at Nusantao! And I have not been asked to stay on as a chef here! I am thinking perhaps I could be a food critic. Sounds like a good job for me. I promise to give all food a chance. In other words, I will specialize in non discrimination cases.

My first press conference

What an event! Luckily, this was not my co-teachers first press conference. Like many things in my life here--- this was a first for me! Mary Pat knew about putting together press packets and the value of such packets. I, on the other hand, know a lot about trying to get attention! So, I took the lead on working with the students on their press conference announcement and Mary Pat got things ready for the press! It was arabic time all the way on this adventure. I asked the students to be at the room ready to go at 9AM for the press conference that was to begin at 10AM. Mary Pat and I were in the room by 8AM. By 9:40 the first students arrived and by 10:30, everyone else showed up ---- even the press! We had about 50 people show up for the conference in addition to our 25 students. The students were amazing! Really! And I am not just saying that! One of the law school professors said he had never seen a better press conference than this one at the university to date! The students not only revealed the portion of the Domestic violence Protection Act they drafted, but also an Action Plan for Qatar complete with their ideas on how to combat domestic violence. The press had questions ------ and the students had answers. Once or twice I jumped in and added some things, but mostly they handled the press conference by themselves. Seven students presented the Action Plan and the rest of the students stood behind them as the 7 students spoke in front of microphones. I was proud. We all were! The VP of the University also attended so I got to meet her. I think she may have even been impressed. Afterwards, we had a couple speeches, one by the Dean of the Law School and another by a business professor and one by a former student who was the inspiration for this clinic. Then we gave out certificates - a really big deal here!--- and then the students surprised US with gifts and an album with messages and pictures for us. It was lovely..... and a surprise for sure. I am told this is not normal for any law school class---- but no one said that this course and the teachers were normal either. One of the profs said he had tears in his eyes during the press conference ---- he had never seen the law students so articulate and passionate about anything! So, that's my report and the brief review of what started out looking as though no one ---- not even the students ----- would attend. I was like a mother hen ---- pacing all around and making myself (and probably all the students) nervous. I felt like I was at my daughter's wedding ----- "Mom, just go upstairs. You are making us all nervous!" Fortunately, J. was there and took some pictures. Yes. the newpapers today covered the event ---- at least several of the newpapers did. One of our students was on the radio last evening and she reported it was a very good experience. The radio broadcast was in arabic so I did not listen to it! So, the course is over now. Mary Pat and I are working on final grades and re-creating our entire syllabus for the ABA. It's the "clean-up" now. The ABA Director for this region took us to lunch today at the Opal Restaurant at the St. Regis Hotel in Doha. It was just openned by Gordon Ramsey (some British chef, I am told). I am no gourmet, so I have no idea who that is, but the food was great! So, I survived ..... and did more than just survive, I think.

The philharmonic and other oddities

I guess you start feeling at home somewhere or anywhere by the end of about 4 months. It seems like we settled into a routine about that time and started looking for non-touristy things to do. Well, that's not quite right. We still do touristy things when I can drag J. along! It's just we seem to know where things are now and we know what google sites to check for what is going on ------ and we know some people that keep us informed of things we might enjoy. There is a very decent philharmonic here. Members for the orchestra were recuited from all over the world. We went the other night. It was fun and the music was really fun too! Some was classical and some was very modern. It was the brass section of the orchestra, so the conductor had the brass play pieces written for strings and for other instruments, which again was just fun! Today we attended the closing of the Cai guo-qiang exhibit at the Museum of Modern Art. Cai guo-qiang was present for the closing and we watched a live "conversation" between an arabic art collector and Cai where Cai answered questions about what he is currently doing (he just finished an exhibit in L.A.) and what he has in the works (Brussels, Brazil and Australia). He also talked about his life in China and how religion has played a role in his art. He discussed how his art has changed over the years as he has aged. He lives in China and NY and has a wife and 2 children (age 22 and 8!) ---quite a contrast in many respects. He calls himself a very quiet man so he does his art work in the public to get some time away from his introspective self and talk about his art with others. We enjoyed his exhibit very much, so coming back for the closing was especially nice. This past week, we also met with a young man who is interested in a Fulbright to the U.S. We met him in the Dubai airport. He works at Education City at one of the American Universities here in Doha. While he was interested in some contacts and information on the Fulbright, he was also kind enough to offer us a tour. What an amazing place this is. We toured Carnegie Mellon and Georgetown and the new conference center. I took lots of pictures. It's overwhelming when you consider the cost and the concept. These universities were invited to open their best colleges here in Doha. Qatar paid for the building and pays for the faculty. The quality is to be identical to the U.S. and the admission policy is to be the same. Cost is also identical as in the U.S. Students from the U.S. and Doha have reciprocity and the graduates are graduates of the U.S. universities. Across the highway from Weil Cornell is a new medical facility that is still being built. It's "budget" is $20 billion. It will connect to Weil Cornell by a tunnel under the highway. The convention center is state of the art. There are at least 3 large theatres in the building, many meeting rooms fully equipped with the latest technology and a ballroom that is outstanding. There are 27 chandeliers in the ballroom, each costs $2 million. In the atrium is a fully staffed restaurant. The parking is accessed by an underground walkway. The architecture is quite unusual and has special significance to the beduin roots of this country. Security is very tight at Education City. So, we really needed a insider to invite us. We had no idea how interesting it is. Wish we had known about all this sooner. At this point, I will stop. You get the drift! Then for a bit of fun. This morning the "Doha Mums" (the expat Brits) put on a "crafts fair". What fun, again! Mary Pat and I spent more than what we anticipated and found some lovely things made in Doha. I only wish I had brought more money with me!!! So far, I bought very little to bring home. Now, I can't say that anymore. And another thing. I think I really can find my way around this city. The roundabouts don't even phase me anymore. Wouldn't you know it ----- just when things get comfortable, it's time to move on!

J's Fulbright

Well, some of you have asked what J. is doing and how he is doing. Come to think of it, most of the 40 plus blogs have been about ME! But, again, I am writing this blog so I guess I have focused on what I do and how I am adjusting. So, as I thought about this blog tonight, I decided to first read what J. wrote as he reflected on the semester and then look at a couple notes he received from students that he shared with me. The work he is doing (and is now coming to an end!) deals first of all with teaching a research class to 42 women (of all different majors) - the only research class in english. The remaining 7 other research classes are in arabic. The second part is giving workshops --- to master teachers that are working with teachers in the 6 independent schools that are failing and workshops with faculty members at Qatar University. I am not sure what to say about any of this. J. leaves our apartment each morning around 7AM and gets back around 4 or 5PM Sunday thru Thursday. He usually works Friday and Saturday, at least part of the day. Often he is finishing power points in the evening for class. If I did not have a job, I would feel like a widow or be very lonely. Usually, the workshops are really good and he comes "home" with a relieved smile. That's how I can tell if things went good! And, then he talks about the next workshop he will do and how it will be even better! Or how, with some space and freedom to set up his own timetable, he could REALLY make a difference. The research class is another matter. Students email him all the time and they stop in his office a lot. Sometimes a lecture goes well and sometimes not. When some students don't show up for class and complain about his quizzes, he is upset and discouraged. When the students cheat, he is disillusioned. When a student seems to understand a new concept, it makes his day. So, perhaps the best way to describe what J. is doing is to share 2 of his students comments. These are quotes: "The biggest thank you of all must go to Dr. John Fritsche, my mentor in the College of Education. I do not think that I could have sustained a level of critical reflection throughout if it were not for his support and prompt feedback. He has always made me and my classmates feel that we are his main concern. " "From the very first day, you were so nice to each and every one of us. You were more than what we would ask for. Throughout this semester you taught me more than just what a research, hypothesis or scales of measurements are; you taught me how a person can be so kind, how kindness has no limits. You showed me the literal meaning of help, the great meaning of generosity. You never gave up on us; you were always there along the way, helping us, doing whatever it takes so that we can do the best in this course. Even though we asked for a lot, more than what we would usually ask for, you gave us way more than what a professor would offer his students or at least this is what we were used to, until you became a part of our lives and showed us how different things can be. No matter what I write, however I express it, it will never be enough to really tell you what you really mean to us or how amazing you are. Thank you so much for being the person you are." So, I guess that says it all. It's been a very successful Fulbright. I don't know if I have described the essence of what J. has done, but he throws himself into whatever he does. Not with 1/2 his brain ---- like I do! But with all of this brain.... and his heart too. Sometimes we wonder whether the effort is worth it. But, when I read this last quote from one of his students, I know J. got all the reward he could wish for ---- a thank you. After all, if you make a difference in the life of a person, you are a success. You have left a legacy. It's 110 degrees even in the evening here. And it is evening here. No matter what, we try to walk at least a couple miles each evening. I best get going. J. has class tomorrow ---- so, he needs to get back to work!

Winding down

It's hard to believe, but we are in the "home stretch" with just 2 weeks of classes until the end of the semester. The students are getting anxious and a bit demanding, wanting to know what grades they are getting so far. Probably nothing different than students all over the world. The difference is that my students have a teacher that is new to this game. While I can remember (barely) what it is was like being a student, seeing things from the other side is very different. So, my co-teacher and I have spent hours and hours finalizing plans for the semester, reviewing portfolios, determining interim grades, giving feedback to final project drafts, offering solace to the nervous and anxious student, planning for a press conference ....... and the final party! Now, I can really get into ordering cupcakes, so I am busy doing "research" on the best cupcakes in Doha. I have not yet chosen a vendor who will get the order, but the competition is stiff. At the final party we will be the awarding certificates ---- a prize the students here really value. Who would have known?? We (Mary Pat and I) have decided we also want a certificate ------ perhaps for the most unorthodox, random, off -the -street teachers these students have ever seen! We definitely get an "A" for effort. I'm just not sure if effort counts!!! We have had some "moments" --- like the time in class this week when one of the students confronted me during class and said she just did not want to give a presentation since she had other classes to worry about and she saw no purpose in this presentation. After giving her a disbelieving look, I launched into the purpose of the presentation and the skills we hoped to encourage by requiring students to give presentations in class. And, of course, a comment about the fact that this assignment was given out 7 weeks ago and I was sorry she had chosen to wait until the last minute when other pressures from other classes were upon her. I went into defense mode ----- only the defendant was ME! Not a pretty sight. But, I can't help but love them all. Seriously, the students here are wonderful. And, I did get an apology the next class! We've been busy drafting part of a law to criminalize domestic violence. It's been a learning experience for sure. What an interesting lesson in cultural differences. Like dating. Domestic violence often occurs during dating in the US. Here, there is no dating ---- hence it makes no "sense" to include dating in the coverage of the law ---- except for non-Muslims..... like me. And, I haven't thought about dating for about 40 years. "Living together" before marriage is illegal so there is no reason to include such circumstances in the law. "Magic" is part of the culture here so emotional abuse definitely must include some reference to this type of harm. And the preamble----- what I would call the heart and soul of the law.... it's purpose. What interesting preambles have been written for this new law. Well, anyway, the press conference will be held on May 28 to not only announce the draft provisions, but also announce the ideas the students have developed to deal with domestic violence in this country. When this all happens and how it happens ----- will be news in itself. Stay tuned. It is truly with a bit of real sadness that I think of ending the semester here. I finally know all the students by name. I have tried to call a spade, a spade ----- so I have confronted those that have failed to put the effort in an assignment that it deserves ---- or failed to cooperate in a group project allowing others to do the work and still take the credit. I value honesty. That has not changed. Well, I best get back to work.

Dubai

I am not really sure how or where to begin. It's really unfair to compare Dubai to Doha. I am really impressed with Doha, so it was somewhat surprising to me when I sensed the feeling in Dubai that the UAE is basically years ahead and many times richer than their gulf neighbors. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised. After all, in America we brag about the tallest building in America standing proudly in Chicago, the large endowment of our private schools, the biggest mall at the Mall of the Americas. The UAE is no different. The themes are reocurring. Yes, the biggest mall in the world is in Dubai ---- the Dubai Mall. It houses an aquarium filled with all kinds of fish including sharks, sting rays, barracudas and all manner of tropical fish. There is a huge waterfall and a gigantic ice rink. An amusement park is dwarfed by the gigantic food courts (yes, plural courtS) and there is hardly a store you could name that is not represented. The Burj Khalifa (the tallest building in the world) can be accessed via the Dubai Mall and there is a arabic souk in the ground floor of the Mall with jewelry and other arabic finery. The Burj Khalifa is very pleasing to the eye. If I had to compare a structure to it, I would name the Trump Tower in Chicago. I wonder if the same architect designed them both. Obviously, the Trump Tower is small compared to the Burj, but the resemblance is there. Back to the Dubai Mall. Needless to say, after one hour of non-stop walking, we had barely covered one section of the Mall and decided we did not need anything after all! The Dubai skyline is amazing and unique. I am impressed with Doha. I think I could pick Doha out of a line-up. Dubai is also unique but many times bigger and even more diverse. The architecture is dramatic and stunning. The newest 7 star hotel (the Burj al-Arab) is a landmark along the gulf coast and looks something like a mast on a sailing ship. The Atlantis Hotel is out in the Gulf on Palm Island ---- yes, the manmade island is in the shape of a palm tree! Apartment buildings, condos, luxury hotels are placed one after the other. The main highway in Dubai is 6 lanes in each direction connecting the business district and the marine district. Jumeriah (what our driver called the marine area) is the section of Dubai where we stayed for 3 nights - in the Al-Habtoor Grand Resort and Spa- at the end of the Jumeriah which is home to the Sheraton, the Westin, the Hilton, the Meridian, as well as many others. We were the guests of Al Habtoor - so we had our room and food taken care of as well as a driver to show us around, a dedicated hotel staff member to accompany us and appointments with some amazing people connected with schools and the Al Habtoor group. Zayed University, American University, the International School of the Emirates, the Al Habtoor main business center and the most amazing mosque designed after the Blue Mosque in Istanbul were just some of the sights. J. was the "real" guest of Al Habtoor, so I just tagged along for most of the visits. Not that I mind tagging along, but I tried to keep my mouth shut after it fell open with the amazing display of wealth set before us. Sometimes that was hard. Zayed University is a private school outside Dubai. The facilities are amazing. The students have a mall like campus indoors that is airconditioned and offers stores and restaurants as well as a first rate library and classrooms that can be accessed without having to go outside yet with views of the fountains in the outdoor atrium. When J. commented about a $6 million grant he was working on at Qatar University, the Director of Development laughed and said, "We talk about Billion Dolllar grants here!" So, it all relative, I guess. The American University at Sharjah is one of at least 20 universities housed on hundreds of acres in the desert all built in similar classical style along a flower and palm tree lined road that stretches for at least 2 miles! We met with the Vice Chancellor of American University, an engaging Lebanese woman who has been with the university since it began 15 years ago. Fifteen years is old and established by UAE standards. J. couldn't help but tell the story of Illinois College that has been around for over 180 years. Now that is impressive! But, it simply doesn't much matter. The main dialog was about collaboration ---- and that does matter! The visits to the 2 international schools (elementary and secondary - each with over 1200 students) was exciting. The principals are both english, one from Scotland and other from Britain. These are now for profit private schools owned by the Al Habtoor group. Over 80% of the students in both schools are non-Emiratis. The education is superb, both schools winning all kinds of awards. But, one hope is to attract Emiratis to the schools and increase the value of education in the UAE generally. The Dubai Creek area is where "it all began" so there is a museum in the area, dhows taking visitors across the creek and a Dubai Museum which is pretty interesting for the entrance fee of just $1.00. Embassies from all over are along the Creek including a brand new US Embassy. Al Habtoor is a real friend of Illinois College. He was in Budapest while we were there, but we drove past his home. The gate to his "estate" happened to be open. Our private driver said the estate consists of many homes where the family all lives. I literally jumped out of our hired car to take a picture ----- after which the gate quickly closed. So, I may have tripped some security alarm. No, I was not arrested and I am now back in Doha. I was worried for a moment! Well, we swam in the gulf - which was like a bathtub - that warm! We walked along the beach in the evening --------- and we sweated any time we were outside a car or building. Our private tour of the mosque by the Director of the administration at the mosque included a history lesson on the UAE and cookies, juice and candy bars! The mosque took years to build and the craftmanship is magnificent. Al Habtoor is a big donor. I wore a burka for the tour and we had a professional photographer along with us during the tour who promised to send us the photos. Don't hold your breath. Remember ---- I haven't learned how to attach photos to this blog! And seeing me in a burka is really not all that fascinating or attractive. We felt special, to say the least. We had a rare opportunity to spend 3 days as the guest of a very influential and generous man who openned doors that would not normally be open to us. We are grateful. We called Mustafa to pick us up at the airport ------ appreciating how short the drive was "home". Back to round-abouts and familiarity. I couldn't help but reflect on this latest adventure. Both are representatives of the arab culture - Doha and Dubai ---- but very different from each other in many respects. I suspect there may be a bit of competition between the 2 countries -----so, what's new? Sounds like Chicago and St. Louis!

Back in Qatar

I am back. After 2 marvelous weddings in the United States, time with my absolutely darling and precious granddaughter (and her parents, my son, my extended family, etc!) and a bout of dystentery, I am back in Qatar. The temperature is now 104 Fahrenheit, so I am complaining and only go outside if and when necessary. With all the work I have to do, this is not really hard to do. Complaining comes naturally and staying inside to avoid the heat is easy for me. J. was thrilled to have me "home", at least that was his first impression. Time will tell! Mary Pat and I are in the home stretch in our Domestic Violence Clinic courses and we have come to appreciate the strengths of each other - and luckily we have different strengths! There is no way I could teach these courses alone. Mary Pat keeps me sane and realistic. And she keeps me laughing - mostly at my ridiculous expectations. I am oftentimes convinced these courses will "birth" the future domestic violence pioneers of Qatar that will awaken the nation and save the people. Sounds like I grew up in the 60's and never quite swallowed my dose of reality! Things have changed since I left just over 2 weeks ago. Our local grocery store is remodeling and I am now lost. Several new homes are almost finished in our compound since I left. The Indian restaurant at Katara is better than I remembered. I tried the local cupcake store that serves icing on the cupcakes as thick as the cupcake itself (obviously not good for anyone that should be watching their weight!). I forgot how much I missed the students and their enthusiasm for studying about domestic violence ---- and how much they love to argue with each other! I forgot how nice it is to have a focus and purpose to my life here, even though it's only temporary and narrow. I spent all morning working on my power point for Sunday's lecture. Right now I plan to take a walk, sweat in the heat, enjoy chatting with J (who is still so serious about his students and his work here!) and look forward to the remaining adventures. Life is good.

Dune bashing, a camel ride and Kathmandu

It's been over a week since I have sat down to update my adventures. It is not because I have nothing to say. As J. would be thinking ---- Barbara, when do you have nothing to say? OK. It's rare. So, here goes. Last week was a week of visitors. Catching up on news from J's family was wonderful as we met with Martha and Frank and their 3 boys for the afternoon on their way to France from Saudi Arabia. My sister Beth and cousin Carole arrived for a week's visit and I tried to give them a variety of things to experience here in the desert. Tasting various local foods -- which seemed to include a lot of Lebanese food (my personal favorite!) and Turkish food -- was interspersed with trips to the Souq Waqif, Katara, Corniche, classes at Qatar University--- and some drives to nearby colorful attractions. We were able to watch a camel race, which was pure luck since the races are over for the season in early April. Got some great pictures and considered buying a camel blanket as a souvenir. I know. What do you do with a camel's blanket??? Well, I imagined I was a college student and needed something colorful to hang on my wall. But, then I remembered I am in my 60's and don't need a camel's blanket. So, I resisted. Just barely. My younger sister is much more practical than I am and asked me the right questions as I comtemplated buying the blanket. I think J. was glad my sister was with me. He usually humors me and we end up with "stuff" we don't need or use. We ate fish at a local fishing town that we selected, had cleaned and took accross the road for grilling. We visited a unique private art collection of Sheik Faisel. We topped off the week with a day trip to the sand dunes in southern Qatar and went "dune-bashing" and rode a camel! The fact that Beth actually agreed to go is another story. Beth gets car sick just riding in a normal car. I guess it was the idea of riding in a 4 wheel drive vehicle (with plenty of air let out of the tires) in the desert sand dunes in the Middle East which was intrigueing enough that Beth put her fears aside. And also the fact that J., Carole, Mary Pat, and I agreed to take turns riding in the back and "way back" that helped. The sand dunes in southern Qatar are amazing! Aside from Nambia in Africa, these are the only desert dunes next to the sea in the world. I think the driver sensed that Beth was really nervous (of course, the rest of us were a bit nervous too!) so he kept the roller coaster driving to a minimum and the gorgeous views to a premium. Actually, a group of previous tourists (Indian and Chinese, I think) got sick in his car from dune bashing and I don't think he wanted a repeat performance. We stopped for a brief rest at the Saudi border and looked across at the patrolled border. It all ended with a barbecue on the beach and we each took a camel ride for a short trip along the Arabian Gulf --- wow! . J. was the photographer! Yes, it's true. We really did ride camels along the Gulf! Thursday (April 5) J. and I took off for Kathmandu for 5 days. We arrived home early this AM. Tomorrow I leave for the States for 2 weeks and 2 family weddings. Kathmandu? If you have heard stories about Kathmandu, they are all true. And I mean it! Oh, my! Our first thought was ---- this is not Doha! I simply called it "third world". J. said that was a term from the "sixties" and not appropriate. By the time we left, J. said on our way to the airport, "Wow, I guess if I had to describe Kathmandu, I would have to say it is third world". So, I am vindicated! There is no order to things including the airport, traffic, shopping, street life. Now, that is not fair. It all works. Just not the way we are used to things working. We were body searched at least 3 times at the airport. That was just to depart the airport! Each time we stood in lines that got us that much closer to our destination, but not quite there yet. Our baggage was checked 3 times and our passports were checked twice. We stood in lines for "foreigners" where only one guard was available to check the people standing in line and literally hundreds of us waiting to be checked! There is a phone number posted on the wall in the airport if you have complaints about the process. I was tempted to write it down and articulate my complaints and suggestions, but after 5 days in Kathmandu I realized that was nonsense! So, after the airport --- what next? Well, we arrived at night - around 10PM so we got a taxi to the Shanker Hotel, my Expedia suggested hotel destination for our 5 day stay. Four stars. After 5 days, we agreed the location was excellent --- within walking distance of so many places. The staff door guards and driveway guards saluted the guests and the staff was wonderful. The front garden was lovely, like no where else in the city actually. We had coffee and snacks in the garden several times --- but the actual hotel was not what is usual for 4 star. Let's just say that by the end of our stay, we rated it a 5 star, but our initial thought was it ranked a 2! Our taxi ride to the hotel was "scary". I am not sure how else to describe it. Actually, a "guide" hopped on the taxi with us from the airport to the hotel (I think he was hoping we would hire him for a later tour of the city!) and told us that the roads were so bad and the streets so narrow so that diplomats would feel sorry for Nepal and give them some aid! We chuckled at that---- just enough to cover the fear that invaded our thoughts. What did we get ourselves into??? The Nepalese must like to conserve electricity. The streets are not lit at night and the shops are dimly lit. It is amazing how dark the city can be when there are no street lights. The roads are so bumpy and rocky that you do not even wonder why there are rarely any newer model cars on the streets. In Nepal cars drive on the "wrong" side of the road. Well, that is an understatement. I am not sure any more what is the correct side. It may just be whatever side you are on. Horns beep all the time. We watched in sheer terror as we rode through the streets, certain that death was near. Well, that's a bit of an exaggeration, but not much. Motorcycles rule the road. Well, not quite, but they outnumber cars, busses and 3 wheel vehicles. They do not outnumber pedestrians, but it's close. Motorcycle drivers must have to wear helmets, but passengers do not. And sometimes entire families ride together on the motorcycles. They weave in and out of traffic. Sometimes I would just close my eyes. Somehow, we never hit anyone or killed anyone. At least, not that I know of. There are no signal lights in Kathmandu. We were told that signal lights would be ignored anyway. Police on the corner are more effective. They signal traffic and pedestrians just run (or jump) out of the way! Street vendors are everywhere. They set up shop on the sidewalk, in small enclosures, along the street, in every available spot one can find! I've never seen such "free enterprise". They sell vegetables, clothes, water, junk, anything! The water is "lethal" to the "uninitiated" (non-Nepalese) so we bought lots of water! The food is wonderful and spicy. Our favorite was "moo" - a type of Chinese dumpling - a steamed dough filled with vegetables or meat. We had moo on a daily basis and already miss it!!! Cheap and delicious! The air is very polluted. Some people wore face masks. Other just cough. We were fine for the short haul. A pulmonologist would have steady business in Kathmandu! We did not see more than a couple medical clinics or doctors offices. Maybe that's because everyone is healthy---- or, medical care is just not readily available. I suspect the latter is true. But, that is just my educated guess. There are over a million residents in Kathmandu and unemployment is believed to be at least 30%. Individuals are taxed at 1% of their income. I question how anyone keeps track of income! Bargaining is the way of life. I never saw fixed prices on anything except in a few actual stores and those were not the normal stores. There is no such thing as a receipt. You just buy things. No wonder the government doesn't have any money! The people are very religious. There are shrines everywhere. I think there is a shrine at least on every block. The main religion is Hindu, but there are lots of Buddhists. The people leave offerings at the shrines like rice, flowers and water. They also put yellow and red markings on the shrines to signify their devotion to the gods. We visited the 3 main palace squares and the main shrines in Kathmandu. Much was apparently destroyed in an earthquake in the 1930' and is still being rebuilt. People just hang around these areas. Not much different than the rest of the city! Foreigners have to pay to get into some of the shrines and palace squares. it was worth the entrance fee! We took lots of pictures. In fact, my camera battery wore out and I charged it just before we traveled to Kathmandu. J. let me use his camera, which he usually reserves for artistic photography! I assure you, my photography is not very artistic! I just snapped away in this delightful country. Our guide told us about the brain drain here. Basically, the Nepalese that have a chance to study abroad or to take jobs elsewhere, do that and never return. That is hard on a country like Nepal. Because Qatar is so close, the Nepalese often go to Qatar. Our guide said that coffins with Nepalese that die in Qatar arrive at the airport with frequency. Brokers take a fee to assist Napelese leave the country. Our guide said he saved $6000 that he paid a broker and she disappeared with the money. When he reported this to the police, he received no help. This sort of thing happens all the time. We walked the streets, the cremation and burial areas, the shrines and palaces, the shopping areas, and even the "jungles" around Kathmandu. We walked thru a forest to a nunnery high in foothills outside Kathmandu to a Buddhist nunnery. The nuns run a school in the hills where poor families send their girls to be raised by the nuns. It's a lovely and peaceful and very simple place on the side of the hill overlooking the Kathmandu valley. The nuns tend a large garden and have cows. They loudly chant mantras in the temple and seem very happy. They even run a "free clinic" on the mountain side and a small shop where visitors can buy things like potato chips! Our guide told us about the polical situation in Nepal. While we were there, the Maoists called a strike. We saw several very noisy political rallies. We kept our distance. Our guide said the Maoists make lots of promises, but most people know that's all they are...... just promises to get you to support them. We enjoyed this guides company the entire day! I have his name and contact information in case you have the chance to go to Kathmandu! (Don't everyone contact me at the same time!) We hired a guide one day that was the most amazing day of our 5 day visit. He took us to the sacred river that runs thru Kathmandu. Lots happens along this river. Slums are located there. Sacred cows drink the water. Children look for jewels in the river. Families wash the feet of the dead in the river. Cremations take place next to the river and the ashes are washed into the river. There is a hospice located right along the river and beside the cremation pyres. Simply amazing. We saw all this happening right before our eyes! Monkeys also roam around, with goats, chickens, and abandoned cattle ------- and lots of dogs! I am not sure how to describe what we saw, but I have never seen anything like it. Trust me. Our last day in Kathmandu we decided to take a plane ride in the Himilayas. We were ready by 5:30AM and took a taxi to the airport. The airline that specializes in this is "Air Buddha". We arrived at the airport and with many other tourists were transported to small planes run by Air Buddha for a 45 minute ride. Unfortunately (or, perhaps fortunately considering the plane!), the flight was cancelled because of bad weather. We were disappointed, but we took advantage of the remainder of the day just walking around and taking in the sights. And, then we had to brave the ride to the airport again at rush hour and the long and grueling check in process. When we arrived in Doha at 1AM this morning we felt we were home! Isn't it funny how quickly a place in the Middle East becomes "home".

Food: My favorite subject

We had our first home cooked meal last evening. I know. You think I am cooking here and am becoming some gourmet chef. I really hate to burst your bubble, but it is not happening. I had good intentions and then other things got in the way. Last evening, our fellow Fulbrighter and J's very dear friend, Mohammed Maroof, invited us to his home for dinner. We made our way across Doha in a sandstorm that ended in a rainstorm, but the weather did not deter us. Mohammed's wife IS a gourmet cook, at least a Pakistani gourmet cook. It was wonderful. We must have had 10 different dishes - beef, chicken, salad, beans, sauces, rice, homemade bread. We had not had such a variety since I don't know when. The seasonings were great - tumeric (I believe), garlic, onion, a tomato base in many of the dishes, and "stuff" I had no idea what it was. Mrs. Mahroof speaks only Urdu, so I could not ask her how she made all this- but she could see our pleasure as we ate. She was lucky she did not speak english. I basically deposed her as I made my way through the various dishes and she just smiled and nodded. Kind of like what J. does when he wants me to think he is listening and he is not. So, my new favorite food is Pakistani food. Know any good restaurants in Illinois that serve Pakistani food? My sister and cousin Carole arrive in just a few hours. I may shut down my blog for a while as I play hostess. Actually, the State Department will be relieved that they do not have to monitor this blog for a while.

A rough start and an awesome ending

The 6 male students gave their presentation for the Domestic Violence Week yesterday. Luckily we arrived early. The room was not set up despite the fact we had ordered it to be set up. The boys were nervous despite their "cool" exterior. They listened to our comment that the ribbons were lavendar rather than a deep purple, so they brought deep purple ribbons to distibute to the audience! I was shocked at their attention to detail. They also agreed as a group that brochures and ribbons would be placed on the audience chairs so those attending would be sure to get them. AFter a quick call to any staff we could find around the building, we directed the set up. We got a bit of a late start. Not really bad since the audience all arrived very late and continued to straggle in during the presentation. It was a good crowd. We were especially happy to see about 20 male students. Remember, the entire law school only has 50 males! We were all pleased that the US Embassy sent Ashraf, a wonderful guy who stuck around afterwards and talked to the students! He also took the time to talk with us and explain some things we probably should have known, but did not. The girls' film arrived midway through the presentation and then did not work! Another story and one that should not be told in this blog! But, the boys were great ----- and pleased ----and relieved when it was all done. They apparently had practices without us and on their own, because the presentation and power points were not what we had seen at our last practice!!! They made us proud. I have a picture with all of them to prove it! The most amazing part of the presentation was the public comment by one of the business profs from QU that attended the presentation. He is a Greek Cypriot, of all things! How ironic! He told his story of the 8 years he taught in the US - in Syracuse. He was asked to assist a group of volunteers in an organization that worked with abused women and children. The orgainization is called CASSA. He was hesitant at first and could not figure out why he was asked to help. He had no background in domestic violence. But, he agreed. As he got more involved he decided to get his business students involved. He chose 3 of the rich NY male students in his class and insisted they come up with a business plan for CASSA. They were insulted. Even one of the student's fathers called and insulted the professor. He stuck to his plan and said they could either do the project or not graduate. They did the project. They also decided to help raise money by setting up a golf tournament and the proceeds ($70,000) went to CASSA. These students thanked him for the opportunity to participate afterwards and 2 of these students now serve on the Board of Directors at CASSA to this day. As part of their project, they had to interview social workers, court personell and battered women. These men learned about domestic violence. it had a huge impact on them. This was in 1995. The professor told the group yesterday that those 8 years were the best in this life because of his involvement in CASSA. Of course, I had tears in my eyes when he finished. I had no idea what he was going to say when he asked me if he could make a comment to the group. When the film failed to work, I simply hoped that whatever he said would bring a graceful end to the presentation. And it did. Mary Pat (my co-teacher), J. and I went to the Four Seasons for dinner (there are several restaurant at the Four Searsons, we ate at the Italian restaurant and sat ourside overlooking the Persian Gulf). Our first (and probably only) really expensive and extravagant dinner. It was awesome. J. was the designated driver. Mary Pat and I had a glass of wine. A fitting celebration. On our way out, the restarant next to the Italian one was having a "sneak preview party" -- free Japanese food. We looked at each other and said, "why not?" We had room for dessert. Oh, my gosh. The dessert was the best. Especially the chocolate cubes! As we were leaving, our "gift" was a free dinner for 2 at any time before August. Mary Pat and I each got one. I thought of Mom. She would be proud! Well, this morning I forced myself to run. Punishment for all I ate last night.

Domestic Violence Awareness Day - March 27

Emily told me to set my sights low. Good advise. The day started out a big rocky. The room was not set up properly. e had no tables. Logically, we asked the set up crew to please get tables. Not so logically, we were told that tables needed to be ordered by Fatma. One could not just "get" tables. Fatma doesn't like her job, us, me or anything. With trepidation, we called Fatma. She said "no". Tables need to be ordered 48 hours in advance. What????? Like any good American, my co-teacher (a law professor from Gonzaga Law School) and I helped ourselves to tables from a nearby classroom. That worked fine for the first couple hours until we were advised that the professor in the classroom needed the tables back for an exam. The stolen tables were returned. We hired a marketing firm to prepare brochures (originally designed by the students with our help and advise), prepare banners and posters and put together 2 huge balloon bouquets as well as ribbon pins, some giveaways (key chains), etc. After correcting all the english errors in the numerous draft proposals that were so last minute I feared we would not get anything and the marketing firm would surely tell us to get lost and hire someone else ----- everything arrived on time and looking very professional. The food arrived, but it was set up outside the room. Again, thinking like an American, I thought it best NOT to have food outside the hall where we were presenting. If I were a student, I would help myself to food and skip the presentation. That is a bit trickier if the food is in the same room as the presentation. But again, against my logic, I was told that food could not be placed inside the room, but must remain outside the room. And, again, when I saw that the table food included brownies, I quickly grabbed a few since I knew there would be none left if I politely waited until noon. As some of you know, I have a policy and practice that I do not consume chocolate until noon. There are exceptions, however. The female presenters did not want their legs seen by the audience. In other words, they wanted a table cloth over the tables so no one could see their legs. Mind you, they all wear abiyas that cover them completely down to their shoes! Again, Fatma controlled the tableclothes. I could not find any table clothes to steal. We did without the tableclothes. The girls wanted RESERVED signs made for the professors who attended so they would sit in the front row. The male class was also attending. They did not want the males to sit close to the front. They wanted them to sit in the back. Ahead of time, I arranged for the "boys" to attend. This was only possible if they were escorted as a group from the male side to the female side by a guard. Despite my fear they would not show up or cooperate (since they were insulted at having to be escorted by a guard!) - they showed up all proudly marching in and neatly dressed in white thobes. Unfortunately, when the Dean of the Law School asked me why I had RESERVE signs on chairs near the back (for the boys!), he insisted that males should be seated in the front row beside the professors! I was close to defying the Dean at that point, but decided I had done enough to end up in jail, so I agreed. The females were so distressed that I was called to the front of the presentation room before the presentation began and they pleaded with me to move the men. I did not, told them to deal with it and the presentation began. One of the girls had made a short (2 minute) film. It was not great, but it got the point across. Violence is not the answer. (By that time, I was beginning to think that perhaps violence was needed at times like this, but I figured now was not the time to show the class that the teacher was not a pacifist all the time. ). Initially, we couldn't get the film to play and the sound did not work. Oh, my gosh! It's hard enough for me to correctly answer my cell phone let along fix a problem like that. The IT men were still in the room and, after a rough start, we got the film clip going. The microphones all worked. The girls did not faint. To my surprise, the presentation was simply amazing! And, the girls spoke directly to the male students seated in front of them --- and were pleased as could be by the kind male response to their presentation. I should have known. They protested for show. At the end, I thanked the US Embassy staff for supporting this presentation, the American Bar Association, Qatar University College of Law and the Middle East Partnership Initiative and, on behalf of Mary Pat (my co-teacher) and me, I told the audience how proud we were to be the teachers of these amazing students. We had a respectable audience at the first presentation and a smaller audience at the second one. All in all, the day was a wonderful success. Importantly, the students learned a lot and were so proud to be a part of this process and to begin the effort to speak out against domestic violence. Finally, we hired a videographer to film the pressentaions. Many of the girls did not want to be photographed and they were constantly asking for my assurance the filming was only for our class purposes. The university was so impressed that I was asked to supply the name of one student who would go on radio in the evening and present the message to a larger audience. Two of my best students could not do this without the permission of their father and husband. The third immediately said "yes". I could identify with the third. Go for it! Permission is over-rated.

Respect

I have been talking to my students about this concept. Actually, I just "fell" into the topic when we were discussing something else. Now I remember. The male students were discussing a concept in domestic violence. How would your family deal with domestic violence --- or, more specifically, now would you deal with domestic violence if you knew it was going on in your family between spouses. That question was met with a question. " Is it happening between my older brother and his spouse or between my younger brother and his spouse?" What kind of a question is that? So, I asked, "Does it make a difference?" The answer, of course, is "yes". Now the respect lesson. If the abuser is your older brother, you would not talk to him directly. You would have to talk to your father about it and see if your father would talk to him. If it was your younger brother, you would talk directly to him and immediately chastise him and he would listen. So, the younger sibling must "obey" the older sibling? Absolutely. What a concept. Actually, what a foreign concept. So. I asked the female students. Same response. Only they decided I needed more of an explanation. It works like this. Even amoung friends, if your friend is "bigger" (which means older), you must respect the opinion of that person. There is a saying here. It is "one day older is a year older". Makes no sense to me, but I guess that means even if you are one day older than your friend, you are owed the respect of your friend as if you were much older. I started thinking about this concept. It sounds like a very good idea to me. Fortunately, my family reads my blog with some regularity. Which means they are reading what I am writing here. I am the oldest of 4 children. Therefore I am "bigger". My siblings are supposed to listen to me. I can already feel the respect. I plan to take what I have learned here and apply it to my life back in the U.S. Not everything. Just the things I like. This is one of those things I like.

Some things out of the ordinary

I will make this fairly short. But, I keep thinking of things that startle me and I want to share them. Like form fitting abiyas. I have noticed that some abiyas are quite attractive and form fitting. I understand this is a significant change from even a year ago. Fashion, I suppose. Today we had a dress rehearsal for Domestic Violence Awareness Week. We have 4 student groups making presentations. This was the first group to practice. Two of the female students came dressed in western clothes. I know these girls very well. I was so shocked to see them without their abiyas I just couldn't contain myself! It was simply amazing! I guess they were dressed this way since this is the weekend and there was probably no chance that any men would be around to see them. The girls brought food to the practice. It was such fun seeing them outside of class. Our "short" practice session turned out to be 3 hours! I still have 3 to go! Those of you reading this blog know how uncreative I am. I am basically a Nazi and lack any type of right brain matter. Well, I am now in charge of this Domestic Violence Week and I am directing the creation of brochures, banners, posters, press releases, room set up and decorating. We will have plenty of food. The rest is debatable. Today during practice, two of the girls tripped on the electric cords and video equipment. They were wearing 5 inch heels. I would have tripped also, but I was wearing sensible black lace up flats. I suggested they wear flats at their presentations. In my girls class, some of the girls are not speaking to each other. Today, they were all getting along. I think they have fogotten their differences for the time being. We are in this together and the drama needs to be placed on "hold", at least for the time being. I give them plenty of things to laugh about.

Random acts of kindness

I have much to say, but think I will write about some things that have surprised me ---- and then add some other observations. It's the kind things that have happened that just surprise me. Not that such things don't happen everywhere - but it's just touching to be the recipient. One of the master teachers in J's workshop gave him 2 beautiful prayer rugs. Such a good reminder that we should get down on our knees and just pray sometimes. It made me think of my 2 special nieces who will be married in April. May they begin their marriages with a prayer and remember that prayer works. And sometimes getting down on our knees helps. Marriage is hard work. Take it from your old aunt and uncle who have been married over 40 years! Another student brought J. a book and signed it. Another gift. Today one of my men students brought me 2 cupcakes. Last week, one of the female students brought me chocolates. We were on a walk in the neighborhood today and one of the Qatari men saw us walking and asked us to come in and have tea with him! (So, of course, we accepted and got to see the inside of a Qatari home!) There is a young Indian man who is a servant to one of the families here. He often greets us in the street when we are walking and always runs up and shakes our hands with a big smile. This morning, the old man with red hair got up from his seat to greet me and wave as I "ran" by him. The men workers all stopped working this morning and called out a greeting as I passed one of the buildings. Each time we go to the grocery store, the young Sri Lankan man who weighs the vegetables greets us and places his hand on his heart when he sees me. The waiter at the tiny Lebanese restaurant we enjoy, serves us with a special smile and surprises us with extra food sometimes. The 4 bread bakers greet us warmly (and sometimes serve us first!) when we come to pick up our 5 pieces of flat bread for one riyal (about 30 cents). My students laugh when I make assumptions that are untrue ---- and then when I laugh at myself with them, I can't help but feel good. Like today. We are getting ready for the first annual domestic violence awareness day EVER at Qatar University. My co-teacher and the expert, is leaving for the US tomorrow and leaving me in charge! Help! You may just want to watch carefully when I report how things turn out----- or not. This could be interesting! Well, I have decided it would be a good learning experience for the male students to see the female students' presentations (which can only take place in the female side of the building) and that the female students should be able to see the male presentations (which can only take place on the male side of the building). As I have explained before, there are locked doors between the 2 sides and signs that forbid female and males to cross over. Guards are posted. Well, I received permission to allow the male students to attend the female presentation, but they must be accompanied by a guard. I figured that would be great. I was following the rules --- silly rules from my perspective, but at least I was following the rules. When I told the male students, they shook their heads and said they were insulted. At which point I told them I would have been insulted also and told them I thought this was a silly idea but I was just an ignorant American so thought perhaps this was normal. They said this was not normal. Then I said that ---Perhaps they needed to be escorted by guards because of what they might do! And I asked them if I needed to be concerned. We all started laughing at that point -------so, I will probably get kicked out of this country at some point without even trying. I just can't help it! I also decided we needed food to attract other students to attend these presentations. My theory is that students will come if there is food. At least when I was a college student about 100 years ago, I would have gone to a presentation if there was free food. So, I discussed what type of food the students would like me to order. They looked at me as if I was crazy. Well, maybe I am, but I really don't think it has anything to do with my obsession with food. They calmly and patiently told me that food is not a motivator here. If I was to offer extra credit or a certificate, those are motivators. Can you believe it? If you hand out a certificate, students will come!? Well, I thought about this. I decided we needed food AND a certificate. This is what you call a compromise. I win. But, I am the teacher. So, who knows how this will all end. The male students are pretty well taking this all in stride. The female students are pretty much mad at each other since some of the girls in their groups are not cooperating and working as hard as some think they should. Drama at the girls end. So, what else is new. It's the same all over the world. Did I tell you how much I love my students? I am sure I have. Well, I do.

A jogger and the lone outpost

This morning as I was jogging around the compound --- yes, I am still jogging!--- I saw another "jogger". Unfortunately, I did not have a camera. As odd as I look, my fellow jogger was quite different from anyone I had ever seen. She was dressed in a beautiful head to toe and face covering abiya. She wore purple tennis shoes --- and she was faster than me! Now, going faster than me is not difficult, but in an abiya, it's simply amazing. Enough said. This afternoon we decided to drive to the northern most tip of Qatar. That would be Al Ruwais. Trust me. There is not much to see. So, we drove to Al Zubara - along the west coast of Qatar --- there we saw an abandoned fort and...... nothing. It's true. Most Qataris live in Doha. We are beginning to understand that. We saw abandoned homes and small herds of sheep ----and desert. A shepherd was nearby. Saw some bedouin tents too. And more desert. But, the entire trip only took 2 1/2 hours - so it was worth seeing. Near Al Zubara is a beautiful new sports stadium and a sign, "Home of the Qatar Olympic Committee". From Doha to that stadium is an 8 lane beautiful highway lined with street lights. The beginnings of gas stations and rest stops can be seen, but none are open yet. Gratefully, we had filled up our gas tank before we left so we only needed a bathroom. There were no reststops with bathrooms. The desert was good enough. I understand Americans are complaining about the price of gas. Well, it's a problem here too. We paid $1.00 for a gallon of gas this morning. I heard some Qataris saying that gas used to be only fifty cents a gallon! So, I guess it is all relative.

Funerals and Cemeteries

A large white tent went up in our neighborhood. Inside were placed red couches. I was wondering if this was for a wedding celebration, but I heard no music nor any festivities. Suddenly the tent was gone. I was riding with one of my students yesterday so I asked her. She told me that was a funeral tent. The men gather in that tent for 3 days following the burial. Muslims are buried in a plain white sheet shortly after death. The graves are mostly unmarked or are marked with a plain wooden stick or pole. All people are equal in death, so there are no fancy grave markers and vaults. When this student's father died, her brother put his own head scarf around her father's head so that the family would "know" him. Otherwise, he was buried in a plain white cloth in the ground. After the burial, family and friends gather at the home for 3 days. The men usually gather in a tent outside the home and the women gather in the home or in the garden (if the home is not big enough). I have never seen a Muslim cemetery. According to my student, there is a huge cemetery on the outskirts of Doha. You would not necessarily recognize it as a cemetery since it is just "adorned" with simple rods for markers. We are all equal in death. How very fitting. Last night we attented a lecture at the Modern Art Museum in Doha. The speaker was an American woman who is a professor at Qatar University in Internationsl Affairs. She has lived here for 9 years. Before that, she lived in China for 7 years. Before that she taught at Cornell and Berkeley after getting her PhD from Harvard. She is an expert in Chinese Muslim society. She had a very interesting presentation which mainly centered around the connection between the Arab world and China. Appropriately, this tied in with the current exhibit at the museum by a Chinese artist entitlted "Homecoming". The central exhibit by the Chinese artist (Cai guo-qiang) featured rocks from a Chinese muslim cemetery engraved with arabic sayings taken from the grave markers in Cai's hometown in China. Hence, the title "Homecoming" -- the rocks with the arabic sayings (from Mohammed) were returned home to the Arab world. There are some 30 million Muslims living in China now. Muslim "missionaries" converted the Chinese just like the Christian missionaries. It was startling to see slides of Chinese wearing abiyas. Equally startling was to see arabic words displayed at mosques that looked like oddly shaped Buddhist temples. Afterwards there was a reception catered by a French restaurant in Doha. Of course, I took advantage of the chance to have a chocolate cupcake!

I am not writing from jail

Bet you thought you would never hear that I actually got my driver's license. Well, today I did!!! Seems like a simple task. Not so. But, I am sure am happy about this. Some background first. This past weekend J. and I explored Doha and the surrounding area south of the city. As I said in my blog about 10 days ago, we rented a car anticipating we would both have our license. Qatar is small, so it didn't take long to drive to where the road ends along the Persian Gulf to the south. There are beaches and sand dunes -- unlike you would see in the U.S. Also 4 wheelers for rent everywhere. I am talking about 1000's of 4 wheelers for rent. We saw very few in use. We also stopped in Al Wakra -- an old fishing town where there was supposed to be the remains of the oldest fort in Qatar. It was there, but you could not visit it. Tourism outside Doha has not been developed. What we did see is poor neighborhoods and many foreign workers - Indian, Philipino, and Pakistani. We also saw Q-Chem -----the Mobil Chemical of Qatar. It's off in the desert in areas where no one would want to live ---- surrounded by signs that indicate you cannot take photos. I did not take photos. We also drove to the Arab Museum of Modern Art. What a surprise. It currently houses a one person show by Cai Guo-qiang ----the Chinese gun powder artist who masterminded the opening celebration for the Beijing Olympics. He is the first artist to have a single person show at the Arab Museum of Modern Art. We had a private tour by a student and her art mentor (a prof from Qatar University) and really enjoyed it. For the most part, the art in this city is truly amazing. There is no quantity of art, but some of the exhibits we have seen have been amazing. This was one of them. We also went to Villagio --- probably the nicest mall in all Qatar. The background part now begins. J. drove the entire weekend. I was trying to respect the fact I had no driver's license. Well, J. daydreams and is easily distracted. Even when he is driving he is distracted and daydreams. It must be the artist in him. On the way home, he forgot about the roundabouts. As he was driving straight into the roundabout, I yelled and hung on for dear life. Well, that brought him back from his daydreaming. He claims we were never in danger. I claim that I am driving from now on. I have waited for my driver's license for 9 weeks now. Everyday, I am sure it will be "today". These last 10 days have seems like forever. I emailed the person at the University who is "helping" me get this license every day for the past 10 days. She is sick of me. So, she told me to be ready this morning at 6AM. A driver would come to get me and he and I would go get my license. Well, a driver (the same one that did not get me a license the last time I went with him!) came for me this morning. He and I drove to the license bureau in rush hour traffic. We walked thru 3 different buildings (the inner sanctum that we had not visited the last time) and he saluted 2 important looking people. They seemed important and we were the only ones in the rooms other than the people my driver saluted. We were then allowed to go up a flight of stairs to a huge corner office with white leather furniture and the biggest Qatari man I have ever seen. He was not dressed as a police officer, but in the beautiful white arab robes and scarf. Two blue uniformed police officers sat in front of him. I was ushered in and he stood and shook my hand. He asked if I was a lawyer from Chicago. That was close enough so I said yes. He smiled and said he had visited Chicago about 10 years ago. He signed my papers and told me to "drive safely". That must have been what I was waiting for. I was already sure I would not forget that Doha had roundabouts, but now I was really sure. Kind of like driving lessons. It's painful and sometimes unnecessary, but it leaves you with a lasting memory. I had waited for 9 weeks and than I was told to drive safely. This warning was really unnecessary after driving with my husband the previous day. I then waited for my driver to do something else for another 1/2 hour. I am not sure what he did, but then he came and got me and told me that I still did not have a driver's license. He spoke almost no english but I understood him to say I would need lessons and another signature. All the way home I had thoughts of panic. In between my 2 classes I emailed the person at the university that I have emailed 10 days in a row. Within minutes she emailed me and said I could pick up the license. It was in her office! Insha'Allah! How did that happen? Of course, I must have misunderstood what had gone on earlier this morning --- or my driver was trying to give me a heart attack!

I just can't resist!

As you well know, I am co-teaching a clinical course on domestic violence. I am learning and teaching things like the cycle of violence and the battered woman sydrome as well as the wheel of violence respresenting power and control, the motivating force behind acts of domestic violence. The physical and psychological aspects of abuse are indeed terrible. We tend to concentrate on the victims. But, it is also important to understand what type of person is an abuser. Abusers often have some common characteristics. For example, an abuser usually denies he is abusive. Even when confronted with the evidence, he denies he did it or that what he did was really that bad. Also, abusers blame the victim! Yes, they will tell you that, "if she had not provked me, I would have never hit her". Well, I am here to tell you that I am packing my bags and heading for the shelter. I have been abused. And so have you. Unfortunately, the news of Rush Limbaugh's comments to the young women that testified in favor of the need to provide insurance for contraceptives has reached Qatar. Even my favorite news reporters told the story. I trust the back lash from his comments will create enough of a reaction to stop this rhetoric. The most amusing (sadly amusing) comment he made after he read his "apology" was that "Obama made me do it". Now, that is shameful. That is what abusers do ---- blams the victim. Well, "nation", perhaps we all need to study the cycle of violence and the theories behind domestic violence ----- and head for the shelters! In the event Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert are reading this ---- I am available to offer suggestions for your next show. Indeed you should include a guest that specializes in domestic violence. That specialist will give you all you need in order to make the comparison!

Some things I took for granted

Dont' take anything for granted. That happens a lot here. Like a driver's license. It's taken 2 months and I still don't have one. Certain I would have a license by Sunday (yesterday), we rented a car Saturday evening. No such luck. Maybe tomorrow. It is a complicated procedure to get a driver's license here. First you need the Qatari ID. That takes a physical exam, an xray, blood test, special letter from your sponsor, some money, a fingerprint check, 2 photos, and several trips to the police station. Once you have that, you can apply for a driver's license. You need an eye test, another special letter from your sponsor, several photos of yourself, your current license and a special signature. The final special letter must be from your employer that contains your job title number. That took many days for me to get since I have special status with the ABA and Qatar University. But, I do have a number. I was just sure it would now be simple. The only hurdle is the special signature. There is only one person in Qatar who can sign an American's request for a driver's license. He has not been available for the last 5 days. Perhaps he is sick, on vacation or has carpel tunnel. Whatever it is, I am still waiting. You probably wonder if there is an alternative. Yes, there is. I can take 12 classes, take a test, flunk and try again. That could take months. So, I took the "fast" route. Temporarily I had to surrender my American driver's license, so currently I have no license. I only drive to work now - I am pretending I am operating on a judicial driver's permit that allows me to drive to and from work. I think I will stop now. I have just confessed and I am not even a Catholic. There are other bureaucratic mysteries that I could tell you about, but again, I think I will stop now. Don't take paper for granted. The College of Law has not had paper for 2 weeks now. I think the entire University may be out of paper. Quizzes for students are printed on the back of scrap paper. I am not complaining. I don't give quizzes. Female and male students have separate classrooms and do not take class together. They also have entry doors signated as "female entry only" and "male entry only". The College of Law is a beautiful brand new building with one side for males and one side for females. The doors between the corridors have signs so the males and females do not cross over. My office is on the female side of the building. That means my male students may not come to my office. I have to hold office hours in the open area outside the classroom. Teachers (like me!) can freely go between the 2 sides. I feel like the United Nations peacekeeping force in Cyprus. Sometimes the doors between the male and female section are locked. I have had to figure out how to navigate when that ocurrs. There are plenty of guards and housekeeping staff and I often look lost, so I have plenty of "friends" who help me out. I don't take their kindness for granted. Especially Tom. Tom gets law professors coffee. I really like Tom. Yesterday a male student needed a handout I had in my office. He had to stand on the male side of the door while I went to my office and returned with the handout. I think he peeked when I openned the door. I do not mind having only females in one section of the class and one section of males. There is less drama and more freedom, actually. Despite the fact that both classes study the same subject, the classes are so different in their questions, concerns, interaction. Many things we take for granted in America are handled differently here. I really love the stark contrast. It makes me stop and think. Some of the ideas here are worth bringing back to the United States. There are reasons for everything. Both here and in America. Different reasons. But good reasons. Right now, I just hope I get my driver's license soon.

Eating fish

Al Khor is just north of Doha along Highway 1A. It is a small fishing town, old and rather abandoned. Along the Persian Gulf sits a small warehouse where the boats dock. The warehouse has fish for sale, fresh fish. You pick out the fish and they clean it while you wait. Today our neighbors (about 8 of them) invited us to go for a lunch/supper at Al Khor. We are experiencing the third day of a desert storm (not the war, just a big dust storm), so we were glad to join them and avoid walking somewhere amid all the dust! We live in an interesting neighborhood surrounded by post doctoral students. It's a very quiet neighborhood generally, most of the post doc students are single and many rent or buy cars while they are here for 2 or 3 years. Today, one of the students was from Malaysia, one from China, one from Egypt, 3 from Lebanon, 2 friends from Poland, and 2 old people from America (that's us in case you didn't know!). Basheer, a 29 year old IT specialist from Lebanon did all the ordering. He claims to have a huge appetite so we agreed he was a good choice. He picked out schrimp, cuttle fish, pearly goat fish, orangespotted grouper, tilapia and squid. The orangespotted grouper is called "Hamoor" here and is the favorite fish of the arabian gulf states. Pearly Goat fish is a favorite of the Lebanese. Once the fish were cleaned, we carried them accross the street to a small restaurant that cooked them - grilled and deep fried the fish --- and served us side dishes. We had fatoush (salad), hummus, bread, fries, another dip and lemons for flavoring. It was a feast! I don't know if I have ever tasted fish so good. We all ate with our hands. Utensils were pretty useless. Kleenex is used for napkins. (That's true at most restaurants.) All together we each paid $15.00 for everything - fish, cleaning, cooking and all the sides. I particularly enjoyed my conversation with the Lebanese and Egyptian. These 2 young men were delightful. We talked about families and plans for the future and what brought them to Doha. Particularly insightful were there questions. The Lebanese asked me if it was true what he had heard: That Americans encourage their children to leave home and go on their own at the age of 18. That seemed so unbelievable to him. How could that be? In the Middle East, children don't leave home until they marry. And even then, they live close by. I loved hearing them talk about their mothers and how their mothers just lived to make their children happy. By the end of our talk, I was thinking about inviting Emily and Jonathan to move back home again. I was practically in tears. And then I got back to our apartment and thought some more about the idea. Maybe I will just go visit Emily and Jonathan when I get home ----- and tell them how much I love them, even though they do not live with us anymore. I better not stay in the Middle East too long or I may change my whole way of thinking and develop some "radical" ideas. Days like this help me realize again and again how fortunate we are to be here. Anyway, it was a lovely day.

My class

J. seems to be working all the time! He has 45 students in his research class and they stop in and email him a lot. He has the only english class in research. All the others are arabic. Many do not have good english skills, so J. is constantly looking for ways to make the concepts simple and understandable. I think if I was a student, I would want to take J.'s class. He is doing all the work for them! Besides teaching, J gives workshops. He gave several to the "master teachers" and next Monday he begins a series for the local independent school teachers. He is also scheduled to speak at a huge education conference later in March. He was also asked to be on a select committee of professors here that mostly teach at the graduate school level- so he feels fortunate to be able to participate that way also. I am having a somewhat different experience. I still have no ID for the university, am not officially on the payroll and share a desk with my co-teacher. Yesterday I got a key to her office, so that is a step in the right direction. I will complete my 2nd week of teaching tomorrow. As I mentioned before, I co-teach 2 classes (clinic courses) on domestic violence in the law school. With all the adding and dropping done, I believe the final count is 19 women and 7 men. Phenomenal considering the entire law school has 250 students, 200 of which are women and 50 of which are men. This course has never been offered before in Qatar nor in any law school in the arab gulf. The subject is very sensitive. The method (a clinical course) has never been tried before. Very, very few studies have been done in the area of domestic violence and there are few resources for help for abused women. Next week I have an appointment to meet some professionals who work with abused women here. At least, I believe I will be allowed to meet with them. My class is hoping they will agree to come to class and talk to the students about services and answer some of their questions. I will be getting the classes ready for their visit! This is all a maybe, because this is not a topic for general discussion and I am not sure what those who work in the field even think about the subject. I really love my students! After a day in class I am exhausted, but I come home with a smile on my face. These young men and women are the future of this country and they are eager to learn for the most part. There are barriers to education that do not exist in the United States. The barriers are economic, social, cultural and religious ---- but that topic is for another day and another time. I am learning and reading like crazy on the subject. I am trying to be creative on how to present this clinical course. Creativity is not my strong point, but I am trying. I can be very passionate when I speak and I start walking around and using my hands to talk. Some of the women get a real kick out of me when I get like that. When I see their reactions, I usually calm down a bit and realize I have gotten out of hand! I may have told you that there are no women profesors at the law school. And few women lawyers. Professional women role models are just not available in any quantity here. So, I have an awesome responsibility. I am amazed at how the students dress for class. White robes and headscarfs for the men and beautiful black abiyas for the women. Coach purses or Coach brief cases and designer shoes. I wasn't really prepared to do much here other than be a "housewife". the designation I was given on my visa. So, I have 2 outfits that I switch off, a pair of sensible black shoes, an informal over the shoulder LLBean bag, and a grocery bag in which I carry my class material. (I can hear from children all the way over here. "Oh, mom, your are not carrying that LLBean bag!") . If I don't get my driver's license by tomorrow, I may also be walking to class. The students either have their own SUVs or they have drivers that bring them to class with maids that ride along and hand them their notebook and writing material. I really hadn't thought about the contrast until I sat down to write this blog entry. But, as the first 2 weeks have unfolded, I am so encouraged. It is natural for me to stick my foot in my mouth --- and I have done that here already --- several times. But, I truly respect the students and I believe they respect me. I have so much to learn from them in these classes. The goal is for me to teach them something also. Let's hope I succeed ---- at least, a little bit.